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♥Hershey Kisses♥ posted: 31 Jul at 6:20 am
it sounds like a knockoff spiderman
Milo posted: 03 Aug at 2:33 am
completely retarded.
Pinkfrost posted: 09 Aug at 9:33 am
so and so. im a writer too and i have an even better idea. waaaaaaaaay better. but right it. its pretty good actually.
MadiKat posted: 10 Aug at 8:44 am
Sounds like a very obvious knock off of Spider Man… except with electric eels
CaLiFoRnIa posted: 12 Aug at 1:39 pm
Interesting. Reminds me of Spider man but is a different character. BTW i thought eels lived in the ocean???
well, thats just how it is. posted: 15 Aug at 7:37 am
yea that’s kind weak
Shawna Monique posted: 15 Aug at 4:15 pm
Interesting, but not very original sounding.
I mean, it’s a good idea as long as you develop the plot a little more. It needs an antagonist a climax and more of a story really. The idea would be cool if you extended it more. Use your imagination!
Read Mine?
s d posted: 15 Aug at 8:16 pm
It could work if you were trying to do a parody of Spider-man.
Lauren J posted: 19 Aug at 3:09 am
Spider pig, spider pig, does whatever a spider pig does, can he swing from a web, no he cant hes a pigggg, look outt it is the spider pig
citsonga posted: 19 Aug at 8:45 pm
something like spiderman huh. i don’t think it’s a very believable scenario. there are already a number of superheroes that have more potent powers than that. but that’s just my opinion. i mean no offense to your idea.
Fat Tay posted: 19 Aug at 10:40 pm
If it becomes a movie, here’s the theme song:
Eel man, eel man
Does whatever an eel can
swims around, shoots a volt
He’s really slimy, and a dolt
Look out! Here comes eel man!
Lana T. posted: 20 Aug at 2:58 pm
Hey there! I know this is just an excerpt but who is “he” first and foremost. You lost me at the word go”, so to speak. But I looooove the idea of this boy having strange powers now. This is Smallville in a way, I know, and that’s okay. I want to see what else happens with this boy.
Worry about grammar and punctuation later when you do your rewrite and just focus on getting your story out first.
Nobody cares about grammar, sentence structure & punctuation if the story sucks, right? The story is what matters at the end of the day. Just look at Stephenie Meyer’s writing for god’s sake. It’s the story that draws people first and foremost.
Melvin posted: 22 Aug at 1:26 am
well, for me it’s good. but try to add some history about the eel. the eel should be a different one.or why dont you try a deep sea creature. i thought there was a deep sea marine creatures that has an electric capabilities. just look on google on these creatures just search deep sea creatures electric shock. for me, it will give mystery to your novel on a different way. its good to use eel but try a different one, deep sea creatures, they are mysterious and never told to any novel(i thought) aside from sharks.
-just a suggestion but it’s up to you— luke was monitoring the sea until he discovers a different marine creature(a deep sea creature that was lost and found on the shallow sea), though usually deep sea guys dont found in shallow seas, but this one was found by luke, and then he gets bitten by that and blah blah…
–(you may not use this cause deep sea creatures are like monsters but i thought there some that look good and beautiful)
–you may check this site:
—but i guess your eel is ok.
– good luck